Writing Riffs – Page 11

05Jun

No Opinion? Not Exactly…It Just Depends

The other day this research company calls and says they’re asking people in my area their opinions and would I have a few minute to answer a few questions.

About what? I ask.

It will be obvious once we get a few questions in, the guy replies.

I must have been temporarily insane or unreasonably curious because I agree to participate. It isn’t but a few sentences later when I remember exactly why I HATE surveys. Of all kinds. Each and every one of them. (This will relate to writing in just a sec, I swear.)

So this is obviously a public opinion poll on social and political issues. Ugh. The reason I hate surveys is because my answers, and hence I guess my opinions, never fit into their neat narrow categories.

It went something like this: The guy says, Answering either Strongly agree, Mostly agree, Neither agree nor disagree, Mostly disagree, Strongly disagree, Should Stephen Harper return to wearing sweater vests?

What!? How should I know? What’s the weather like when he might be wearing them? Where is he going when he wears them? Are they plaid or tartan or plain? How much do they cost? What does he think of them? And of course by now I’ve forgotten the categories so I have to ask what they are again.

Well, I don’t know, I say in exasperation.

Um, I can’t put that down as an answer, the guy says.

So I have to select Neither agree nor disagree. But that’s not entirely accurate. I would have an opinion if I had more information or if there was some context.

Or how about this one? Answering either Highly favourable, Mostly favourable, Mostly unfavourable or Highly unfavourable, What is your opinion of Canada Geese?

Uh, anything else to go on there? Are they eating my grass and creating huge lumps of green fecal residue on the lawn? Are they a fluid V flying overhead on a crisp fall afternoon? Are they honking melodiously from the nearby marsh on a warm spring evening? Are they hissing at me as I walk through the park? What!?

Uh, that’s all that’s written for the question, the guy says.

Sheesh. Guess I don’t know then. Oh, sorry, that would be the secret No Opinion category the guy says he can put my answer in.

But it’s not like I don’t have an opinion, it just depends!!!

It probably took me twice as long to do the survey because my reaction to pretty nearly every question was like this. Obviously those weren’t the real questions, but same idea. Is this a writer’s curse to make up all these scenarios? Do we all make a seemingly simple question into a philosophical exercise? Well, whatever. It was more fun than the boring answers they provided. I say here’s to enjoying the creation of nuances, grey areas, complex characters and rich back stories.

And the next time some guy asks if me if I have a few minutes to answer a few questions, I should just answer, well, that depends. Just exactly how much time have YOU got?

© Lizann Flatt, www.lizannflatt.com
No part of this blog may be used without written permission from the author.

18Mar

Your Story Doesn’t Stink, Honest!

So I’m working on a student assignment (as part of my work for the Institue of Children’s Literature) and I’m rereading the edits I made on the manuscript earlier that morning.

I read:

Wow! Good fart!

EXCUSE ME? What was I thinking???? Good gawd I am ashamed of myself.

But then I looked closer at my, um…er, less than stellar penmanship. I realized that what I had intended to be a ‘c’ is in reality coming across as an ‘r’ and hence causing the confusion.

I pull out the old pen and emphasize the curve of the ‘c.’ Fixed. It now reads:

Wow! Good fact!

Phew! Caught that one.

© Lizann Flatt, www.lizannflatt.com
No part of this blog may be used without written permission from the author.

18Feb

I’ve Been Reprinted

Just got a small surprise in the mail! Apparently my poem was reprinted in Babybug’s May/June 08 issue. I’m a little behind the times, I know. I did actually know about the possibility of this but I have to admit I forgot all about it for awhile. It would be nice to get an author’s copy…but maybe it’s in the mail. ??

This whole issue may be the same inside as the original issue in which the poem appeared. The cover sure is the same. But I know if your readership grows up it makes sense to recycle some of your best content. And hey, I’m flattered to be recycle worthy! (And I did get a reprint fee.)

This magazine was much loved by my kids and I when they were small. My copies are all dog-eared and chewed, a few pages stuck together likely by drool, but they lasted very well. It was such a nice surprise to get a new issue in the mail. And I started reading to them as infants so the short pieces inside worked perfectly for their attention spans. As a writer, this extensive reading of the magazine meant I did do my “homework” into what they liked to publish before I had a piece accepted by them. Actually, two pieces eventually. (Details on my website www.lizannflatt.com if you’re interested)

All three of my kids now love to read, and for that I’m truly thankful. I can’t help but think that maybe Babybug played a real role in that.

20Jan

Writing Interruption

I’ve actually been writing, hooray!!

But have you ever been typing away when all of a sudden the actual act of typing jolts you out of the flow of what you were writing? I mean, some words are just so darned fun to type that I suddenly become aware of the mechanics of typing them.

This happens to me most often with words typed entirely by one hand. These are my faves:

address
opinion
areas
minion
million
recess
excess
access
hilly
lily
wave
were

And just plain fun to type: committee. In fact, I usually end up putting two “i’s” in there because I get carried away.

Apparently I’m easily distracted.

Found any faves yourself??